The First month of the year is over. Tomorrow, we start the month of the hearts. This is my early greeting. My winter song, my daily photo-blog for the month of January, 2012.
I wish you well.
(Photographs are from my winter, 2008 collection)
I’ve been trying to chase the tail of my thoughts of winter. It’s very elusive and by the time they start to take form in my head, the heart has given up, benumb from wintry frost. I need to take hold of my thoughts’ loose end, so I could untangle the thread jumbled, nagging me to get written.
I walk the frozen grounds of the earth, trying to find the pulse of this entangled thoughts under my chilled feet. I welcome the icy kisses dropped on my cheeks, on my shoulder, on my chest of this year’s first snowfall and opened my arms to accept its cold embrace hoping its biting affection give me some clues to the stories of this unforgiving season.
(“Man in the Snow,” a photograph from my winter, 2008 collection)
The man continue to walk the icy grounds, his feet digging deeper leaving frozen trails of footprints to a direction unknown.
The mind drifts away with the winds to the past and the uncertain future.
The heart is undaunted.
In the midst of this season’s frosty silence, the winds croon the pines with sad notes whispering threnodies to the doozing earth tucked in a blanket of snow, as my soul keeps still listening and writing the songs of winter.
Crafted From Pain
By: Jeques B. Jamora, 2007
Why did you blow the candle off
That used to light my heart?
Now the daylight is tainted
Each day is gloomy since you depart.
Why did you cut the thin thread off
That used to knot mine to your heart?
Now the love tale has ended
And we are growing apart.
Why did you turned the music off
And stopped to serenade my heart?
Now our love song has faded
Who would replace to sing your part?
Why did you ripped the pages off
That hold the treasures of my heart?
Now I am left empty handed
Creating naught but worthless art.
But don’t feel sorry I’m not jaded,
You have loved me for my resilient heart.
I would soon be taking off
And soar again to a brand new start.
I guard the ‘lil flame inside me
Springtime would melt my frozen heart.
A love tale would sprout some day
And you’ll not play a single part.
I hum a novelly and simple melody
The tunes coming inside my scarred heart.
The lyrics are forming slowly,
A love song I’m enthused to start.
I pick strewn bits of harmony
Saving each treasure in my heart.
I thrive to live for one more day,
This pain I’m crafting to priceless art.
Merry Christmas everyone!
The writing prompt this week at http://writersisland.wordpress.com/ is “This Season.” Thoughts battled in my mind on what to write and share to the islanders this week. I’m celebrating the holiday season this year in silence, work as usual and I’m intentionally ignoring the season being alone away from home, with my father in the hospital battling with cancer back in the Philippines ~ it’s quite depressing. But I don’t want to drag everyone to my own worries. I have so much to be grateful than to complain about. So I decided to re-post my entry about my first snow last year. “This season” is for kids, my first snow is the season that the child within me patiently waited.
My first snow, December, 2006.
I feel restless unable to stay focused on my review class, there is that unsettling force of a child in me that could not wait. I tried to keep my eyes and ears to the lecture reminding myself that I need this review and I need to pass the NCLEX. But the longer I stay seated the more I become uncomfortable unable to absorb the lessons. My mind is somewhere outside.
I excused myself out, taking the heat for a reason ~ it was turned high because of the anticipated snow storm tonight. I need a fresh air to breath. I went out of the building with only my sweater on to find out what makes this child-like unsettling force in me.
My eyes sparkle, I shiver from the mix cold and excitiement. I raise my head to the heavens, I opened my palms and my arms in acceptance ~ and for the first time, the snow touched my brown skin.
That is how I’m going to remember my first snow. You just don’t understand how that feels. I was 34 when I first saw and felt my first snow touching my brown skin. The child inside me waited for that moment. It was bliss.
My first snow, December, 2006
The morning after.
I draw the curtain open and from the window I saw the world around me had turned white overnight. I view it wide-eyed like a child. The images of the lovely tracks of vehicles and shoes in the snow-covered grounds was captured in mind and printed in my heart forever.
Today, already an RN, I walk fast the concrete side walk, cotton soft to my steps with 5 inches of snow that carpet my path. The icy winds brush my my face with frozen kisses carrying my thoughts to distant past. I watch a child viewing a christmas card of snow dreaming of white christmas.
The child has arrived.